Surrender Your Agenda.

This idea of “Surrendering Your Agenda” came up in the sermon given tonight by Ben at SPCC. It was one of four steps to T.E.S.T.ing God’s will.

Talk to God.

Examine the scriptures.

Surrender your agenda.

Tap into others.

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Do any of you have an idea for where you want to be in 10 years?

Sure. A lot of us do. But, do you make it an absolute agenda? A must? Are you positive that it is where you will be, and that you will have certain things and accomplish certain goals, no matter what?

Two years ago, had I been faced with these questions, I would have answered, “Yes, of course.” And I would have explained that after college I planned to marry, get a nice house, have kids and eventually open my own counseling center for children.

Two years ago I had an agenda for my life that I was certain I would follow. I would chase after the “great American dream” where everyone is happy and has dogs running around inside their white picket fences. We have all wanted it, dreamed about it and hoped that it would come true at some point or another.

Today. Sunday, March 30, 2008. I am confident that I have surrendered this previous agenda, and any agenda for that matter. Sure, I have a “To-Do List” that I have made with things that I hope to do when I am finished with school. The items on this list, however, have strayed away from “get married, buy a house, have kids and then develop my career.”

Today. Sunday, March 30, 2008. I have high hopes for what is to come in my life, but I am putting it in my faith that I will do what I am meant to do.

This does not mean that I am throwing my hands up and telling God to lead me where he wants me. This does not mean that I am going to live day to day with no care in the world and become lazy because my purpose is coming. It means quite the opposite. It means that I am doing what I have already been instructed to do and waiting for the push to do the rest. I am living each day with more love and compassion than the previous and holding strong to what I believe.

So, when I do graduate school… will I visit Africa? Will I travel New England and spread the cause of the Invisible Children? Will I run a non-profit organization? Will I attend graduate school? Will I volunteer with Americorps? Will I open my own counseling center for children?

I don’t know. These are things that right now, in this moment seem like a good fit for my life down the road. But for once, I am fine and find comfort in the phrases “I am flying by the seat of my pants” or "I am going wherever the wind blows me". I am at peace with the idea that I do not know exactly what is coming, but I am sure as anything loving the search.

My relationships and encounters over the past few months have taught me that it isn’t all about knowing right where you will be in the future, for we are always apart of a process and things are constantly changing. Surrendering your agenda and putting faith in yourself and in God (for we are all apart of a grander plan)-- that is what it is all about.

Live with intention, love what you do, listen to what you have already been told, and wait for the rest.