Problem Solving.

This past week in my Cognitive Psychology class, Prof Moreno began lecturing on problem solving and how we humans go about doing it. He described a bunch of the specifics, but also pointed out something that really struck me even though it may seem obvious:

Sometimes, finding the solution to a problem greatly depends on overcoming the mindset you have when presented with it.

He went on to talk about this in technical terms and in accordance with a mathematical problem, but my mind wandered in another direction.

On a day to day basis, when we are faced with a problem, if we had been having a good day prior to that, we may have a clearer sense of how to resolve the issue at hand. On the other hand, had we been having somewhat of a bad day, we may approach the problem with less patience.

Something else caught my attention (as if I'm not supposed to be paying perfect attention to the entire lecture haha). Prof Moreno described functional fixedness as only being able to see tools for problem solving serving the primary function they do in everyday life. In other words, we are unable to use things for purposes other than what they made for, regardless of their ability to be used in other ways.

So, quick recap- our ability to solve a problem depends on our mental set (the mindset we have when presented with the problem) and our inability to be flexible with the tools we are given.

What if we could get out of such mindsets and be open and clever enough to use tools we were given in new and inventive ways?

What if we could step outside of the box and look at the big picture in order to formulate the best solution?

What if we took this knowledge that has been proven by psychologists and find a way to overcome this natural process?

Perhaps problems would be solved quicker, easier and with longer lasting effects.

Food For Thought

I have recently started reading a book which was highly recommended to me. It is Chasing Daylight by Erwin McManus. Although I have only read 2 chapters so far, it is full of amazing insight and thought provoking messages.

Here are a few of my favorites so far:

"We have defined holiness through what we separate ourselves from rather than what we give ourselves to."

"While God leaves us with many choices to make, when He has spoken, the one right choice it to obey."

"There is a tragic reality in that many times the very things God blesses us with become obstacles to seizing divine moments."

"The practicality of the life of faith is that you begin making wiser choices."

"The challenges you are willing to face will rise in proportion to the character you are willing to develop."

"When you are madly in love with God, you can do whatever you want."

McManus is just full of such passion and puts together his ideas so wonderfully. It speaks straight to my heart. I am really looking forward to the rest of this book!

Alone? I think not.

“What can I do for you. What questions do you have?” One of my closest friends asked me this last night when we were just hanging out, getting into the word and journaling a bit. “Umm, nothing really. I think that as I continue reading the bible that I will have questions. And I have yet come to that place in my journey where I have any doubts or major struggles.” That was my response.

It was like God heard me and chuckled a little and realized that maybe I better get a quick look at the not so beautiful. “Today” started with me praying before bed that my hours of rest would rejuvenate me and help me to prepare for the rest of the day. I woke up and prayed that I would see God in more parts of my day than I had in the previous. It started off great. I enjoyed the beautiful weather, worked on the Better World Books service project and went out with Mae for a bit. Then I had class and shortly after that headed to Lyon Manor with my PHP friends.

This is where it gets weird. I love community service. I love my PHPeople. I love playing UNO with the residents of Lyon Manor. I love seeing the smiles on their faces that I can picture usually looking much sadder. I love the feeling of helping others. Yet, I was not happy. I was not feeling loving. I felt cold and angry and annoyed.

The worst part- I had no idea why. I got on the van and came back to campus the same way. People were in the back seat dancing and singing and having a great time and I was praying, asking for an answer as to why in the world I couldn’t get a smile on my face and stop acting so ridiculous.

I opened the door to my room, fell onto my bed and wept. Again- with no idea why. I stayed on my bed like this for a long time. Wondering why.

All of a sudden, an immense feeling of loneliness came over me. Nobody to talk to. Nobody to hug. Nobody to hold me. Just nobody. I contemplated just crawling under my covers and crying until I fell asleep, but something inside me told me get up and get out.

I went to the Student Center where they serve pancakes every Thursday night. I brought along a book and my journal, figuring that I would just get something to eat and sit alone reading and writing. (Usually I look forward to this, but tonight it was more just to keep my busy). I walked into the Café reluctantly, and the first thing I saw was Andrew’s smiling face. He greeted me with a huge hug and from there, we really enjoyed the night together. I saw God in this moment, in a big way.

Looking back (even though it was just earlier tonight), do I think that this was a huge struggle? No, not really. Was it difficult to feel angry and very upset and not no why? Yes, extremely.

It’s as though God just wanted to show me that it’s not always going to be rainbows and butterflies, and I am thankful for this glimpse of something different.

Crying in my bed overcome with feelings of loneliness. I have learned that in these times, I need to just take a deep breath and talk to God. He is always there. Always listening. Whenever. Wherever.

Help.

God grant me the serenity

To accept the things I cannot change

The courage to change the things I can

And the wisdom to know the difference.

After recently finding out that my father has fallen back into his old habits of drinking and doing drugs, I am devastated. I have had a few weeks to reflect on this situation and all of the evil that surrounds it, but also to tune into the grace that God has poured out over my dad. Although he has been using certain drugs and drinking alcohol intermittently over the past year, he has not started doing the most lethal drug to him again, and I thank God everyday for that.

I am also so thankful that he has opened up to me and I believe that this is a cry for help. I have rid myself of any anger and resentment toward him and this awful situation and I am ready to love, help and heal, along with the power of God. One of my greatest hopes is that he accepts Alcoholics Anonymous back into his life. Since he has also semi-recently accepted Jesus into his life, I believe that the AA program would have more of an effect on him than ever before.

Another miracle that I have seen through this that there is never ending support for myself and more importantly for my father. The community at St. Paul's never hesitates to pray about this situation when I ask, and I have found that my closest friends are nothing less than amazing when it comes to supporting a friend in need.

I still ask, however, for your help. Your prayers. Your hope. Your smiles. Your encouraging words. Your hugs. Your love.

My dad cannot get through this alone.. and neither can I.

Help, please. And really.. thank you.

"He said it all."

"Don't throw the ball at him, if you're mean he won't come back." -Willy.

I was hanging out with a good friend of mine when he shared a story with me about earlier in the day when he was volunteering at an after school program. To my surprise, he went back after finishing his community service requirement and was really enjoying spending time with the kids. It made me so happy to see the smile on his face and the sincerity in his voice when talking about the afternoon spent playing basketball and hanging out with the elementary students.

"He said it all." Alex told me. "When Willy told the other little kid not to throw the ball at me because I wouldn't come back, I realized how much they looked forward to me coming."

Alex continued and told me that he was definitely going to go back, hopefully at least once a week. It made me so extremely happy, beyond words. To hear him talking about the children with such passion in his eyes and to then listen to him as he thanked me for helping motivate him to serve, was so encouraging.

This was a sure sign from God and great motivation to continue to spread love and compassion and the importance of helping others to those around me.

Willy said it all to Alex and Alex said it all to me.

Emotionally Tiring Day

Do you ever have those days where your emotions are just everywhere? Where you have tears streaming down your face but you can't quite figure out if they are happy or sad so you decide that they must be a mix of both?

No matter how much I promote growth and change and live for both of those things, sometimes it is so hard to stare it straight in the face. I never really developed the knack for it and this was made evident to me today, as if I had somehow forgotten.

Leaving campus for the summer. Listening to my sister give her SENIOR speech. Thinking about my friendships with those back home. Assessing my relationships with people at school. Figuring out my Next Steps in my walk with Jesus.

My head and heart were jam packed with ambivalence.

Love. Happiness. Joy. Pain. Sadness. Hate. Confusion. Smiles. Heartache. Awesomeness. Tears. Loneliness....

Tears.
The salt runs over my lips.

"I am so proud of my sister, she is nothing short of amazing." I said tonight to a parent after Ashley had given her speech. "I am so excited to see her growing up into such a mature young lady." Am I? Or am I sad that she is growing up? Were the tears I cried happy for her or sad for me? Or both?

I am emotionally exhausted, today.. right now.
But I have hope. It is refreshing almost, to cry it all out and make room to take in more. To wrestle with your thoughts, to question the meaning of things.

To have the ability to feel, to cry, to care, to wrestle-- is amazing.. I am blessed.

Shimmering across the landscape

Unifying our world

Never ending hope

Springtime motivation

Happiness uplifted

Invigorating feeling

Now things will grow

Everlasting light

**************************************************

We need it. We love it. We crave it. We want it. SUNSHINE. Warm sunshine.